Captain’s Log

UPDATE!!!

“So I’ve decided to update the log add what I did in the beginning of this adventure.  

So TD-0, I arrived at Maxwell, got assigned to Papa Flight and immediately became flight supply officer.  TD-1, took the dreaded FTM and Airmans Manuel tests.  was freaking out hoping I passed.  Only 1 from our flight failed as we discovered.  TD-2, took the PFA.  Didn’t do as good as I usually do but still passed.  TD-3, got assigned to parade duties.  Originally assigned Gideon bearer.  Later on got assigned to guide instead because dude was concerned i wouldn’t be able to hold the flag up long enough…(-_-) meh, tell me why dude they replaced me with can’t hold it longer than me, I was like ‘WTF mane’.  TD-4, went to the obstacle course.  A bunch of people got heat stress and dehydration.  I went through the course and was almost done then I started getting light-headed…I was highly upset.  After all the people got sent to the clinch though, the fire fighters cut on the hose and we all got to play in the water.  It was mad crazy.  TD-5, went to project X.  I got to lead the first exercise…we didn’t pass it though but its whateves.  TD-6, went to the hospital for my shoulder.  Got some x-rays but nothing too serious but basically imma be in pain for the next two months, strained muscles in my shoulder (totally sucks) THis was also the first day of combatives.  It was uber awesome! TD-7, second day of combatives.  Plus got to go to the gun range and shoot the m-9.  Wish I coulda made expert.  Also I was squadron commander today.  Totally freaking out!  Overall I don’t think I did a horrible job though.  When we came back from the range though we were orphans for like 15 minutes, I thought I was gonna get in a ish-load of trouble.  Didn’t though.  TD-8, third day of combatives.  Went on a warrior run with the Col. too and almost died.  I have no idea who thought it would be a brilliant idea to run in Black flag conditions.  TD-9, last day of combatives; totally went all out, atleast in my mind I did.  TD-10, ‘last day’ at Maxwell.  Left for JFTC at like 9am, but first the Capt made us clean our entire building and one we don’t even live in.  TD-11, JFTC totally sucks.  started classes today though, got our Maybaleen Tan on.  TD-12, went to church today the pastor was kinda lame.  Plus I stood in line for the toliet for 30 minutes so only got to be in the actual service for like 10 minutes…But whateves.  TD-13, today began the mutiny planning to rebel against the machine (CTAs and FTOs) this day became know to may as TD-341.  We were low on spirits and ready to go home, missing out CTAs and FTOs from Maxwell.  Today was also the day my roommate moved all of our stuff and didn’t tell me, I was totally about to to off cause I thought a CTA came and took my junk…she had been complaining since we got to JFTC about not being in the same tent as everyone else.  (Annoying as Freak)”

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Captain’s Log July 15, 2012

TD-19

“So didn’t get to write yesterday…kinda bummed, a lot was going on.  But anyway, to recap; yesterday we went on a road march; I spotted the 1st dude (very awesome) got shot like 10 times though at the end.  Then we had career day too, it was kinda lame cause, as expected, there were no medical officers whatsoever 😦

Anywho, on to today; this morning at reveille i saw like the sexiest thing ever in the sky *Apparently one of the stars was Mars* It just really caught my eye; It was a wonderful start to my day.  (made me smile inside)

The fun part started as we loaded the buses for our warrior run… (noted sarcasm) I was thinking of every way possible for me to get out of having to run…of course i ended up running anyway.  The whole way everybody’s encouraging me, which was cool since I was so ready to stop then around mile 1.5 my knees started cramping up and around mile 2.5 i started hyperventilating…but they wouldn’t let me quit, so I kept going in an immense amount of pain and made it to mile 3 where I promptly proceeded to collapse in the nearest patch of possibly ant infested grass.  and of course everyone’s freaking out.  I don’t remember exactly what happened next, I guess I blacked out for a few minutes or whatever cause next thing I remember was getting some kid’s random water and going pee, then of course by then we were on our way back.  On the bright side we finish in 26 minutes (our goal was 3 miles in 27, well theirs anyway) Plus i finally ran a 13 minute 1.5 mile.  

Anywho, today i decided not to go to church, so I sit here writing in my log I’m currently trapped with two who shall not be named.  *cough cough*

So as it’s known, I’m a people watcher, I notice things that most others don’t.  So I don’t know what it is, but there’s just something that doesn’t sit right with me about these two…well I mean, I know what it is…so let me rephrase that then:  

SUBJECT 1–> is like a selfish control freak.  Always wants people to do stuff for them but never wants to help out in return.  The biggest discrepancy to this claim being if it can in anyway possible positively effect them {subject 1}.  For instance on an inspection subject 1 got complemented on their bed (which i had done) but took all the credit.  And I don’t really care about that, I care that never once have I received a ‘thank you’.  I’ve also noticed that subject 1 is almost somewhat of an instigator; likes to take about people, complaining about them but then turns around and tries to be their BFF…But whateves, on to subject 2

SUBJECT 2–> is basically subject 1’s play thing it seems like.  Whatever subject 1 says do subject 2 does…its kinda ridiculous since you can see on their face the annoyed-ness (is that a word?) (oh well) *shrugs*

Dude! That tuna MRE I just ate, so not the business…got me bout to throw up…ugh!

Anywho, time for meditation 🙂 *pardon my sketches*

Damn…meditation cut short; so i was goin pee just now and i remembered thoughts from earlier…Like I miss him…even though its been officially proven hes an asshole.  I keep fining myself just sitting reminiscing on stuff; that pain AJ was talking about keeps coming back.  Totally pisses me off, I’m trying not to thing too much about it though.  But I think I pretty much saw this coming -_-…

Captain’s Log July 15, 2012

*recently while cleaning my room to pack to go back to school i found some papers from field training…it was like a little journal i kept towards the end.  i thought i’d share my thoughts from that time.  No judgments, and don’t mind the spelling errors; it was rough out there and I was going through some things.*

 

“So apparently I lack motivation and my attitude needs improvement…At least that’s how it appears to my peers.  Last night I decided that for now on out; until I leave this place in its entirety, I’m turning over a new leaf.  I gotta start being more positive, even if this really is the pits.  People said some real ish yesterday I gotta take it all in and start bein a Boss.  of course I completely disagree with them sayin i’m not motivated.  If that was the case I woulda been chucked the deuces.  But anywho, these prayer circles my tent does every night have been helping a little bit too; I’m gonna start back with my meditation today though.  I think that would really help me out a lot.  overall i just need to get back to being the Rock Start I am, no more foolishness.  On a positive note, today a bird landed on this kid’s head; it was totally awesome, frickin hilarious man.  I’ve decided to also take someone’s advice and set small daily goals for myself.  Today (aside from making meals) my goal is to not show frustration, i think so far I’ve been good to go.  

so yesterday we got to go to the museum.  Very cool getting to see stuff (not really of course) but just glad to get off the COL.  Did of course see interesting stuff about the people.  Kind of my motivation for today.  I wish they had had more though, that would have been nice.  Like seein that stuff today basically tied into my thoughts on my surroundings so far since I’ve been here and on the future too I guess.

Like bein the only Black female in my squadron makes me feel some kinda way about life.  Like i represent a ridiculously small population out here and if i don;t make it here I’m letting down the people.  There was an exhibit of a lady I saw today; Major Charity Adams, lady was the first Black woman to become a commissioned officer in WAAC.  I aspire to be like her.  I mean obviously I can’t be the 1st but I can still do great and awesome things, see something I want and just go for it hard-core, no stopping.  Cause I wanna stand for something and represent great things and I really truly believe I can and will I just think I have an obstacle; which would be myself.  In these last couple of days I’m determined to channel my inner-self.  It’s about to go down! *In my Kevin Heart voice*

Its refreshing to know that other people feel the same way…*more to follow*”

July 25th…today

Sooooo, Its been a minute <as usual> but I just finished reading through all of my posts <literally> and I thought to myself “self!” and myself said “huh?” and I said “I be talkin bout some pretty real shizzz on here”

So this time world i’m for real.  I shall indeed be supplying my page with a post *at least* once a week.  Maybe I’ll start setting a timer to remind me…or tie a piece of string around my finger, be all like ‘why the heck is there string on me?’

~Meh idk, just be on the lookout for me world~